Published: October 18, 2007 12:34 pm            

Drugs touch many lives - Week 13

October 10, 2007 — Editor’s Note: This is a series of first-hand accounts of lives touched by drugs here in Carter County The names will be changed to protect identity.



During the past weeks as I’ve read the detailed stories of lives destroyed or permanently damaged by drugs. It reminds me how we are all the same.

We all love, hurt, cry, bleed and die or survive. We hurt for ourselves and for our loved ones. We refuse to give up on those who mean so much to us. We let them continue to hurt us as they destroy themselves. We know they do not realize how their actions make their family and friends miserable, or that by destroying their lives they also destroy ours. They destroy our lives if they live the life their drugs teach them to live, or if they die and leave us here…that destroys us also.

My sister, who I love so much, is slowly, slowly killing herself. I watch as she stumbles through this world in some kind of a stupor. She denies that she has a problem and says that she has things well under control. She refuses any help we offer for rehab. She’ll take any money you give her and tell you a fabulously designed and well thought out lie. But we’ve heard them all before. She has lost everything and she doesn’t even care. I get so upset with her when I hear our precious mother saying she is afraid the next phone call or knock at the door will be bad news.

When mother hears that someone’s son or daughter has died of an overdose, she wonders sometimes if her child will be next. We never know if my sister is dead or alive. Sometimes we don’t hear from her for days and days. My brothers and I love her so much, but we fell helpless. She looks like my sister, and her voice is the same, but my sister would never do and say the things this girl says and cause our mother such worry and pain.

I’m not sure who lives in my sister’s body and controls her mind but I WANT MY SISTER BACK! I still see my baby sister when I look at her. The sweet little girl that I fixed waterfall ponytails on top of her head while I wiggled and squirmed, trying to get away and the heartbroken little girl when her dog “Bobbie Dan” died. She has been on this dead end street for nearly 30 years. Her drug of choice has changed several times over the years, but the last four or five years have been the very worst. I often wonder how her body can take much more. Nothing we’ve tried over he years has helped.

A million prayers have gone up for her, and I know the Lord is going to save her from herself. I know the Lord loves her the way she is, and he’ll forgive her and make her whole and healthy and happy…if she will let him. She knows this because I’ve told her. I know my sister is in there somewhere and I hope she realized what she is doing to herself before it’s too late. This last sentence is to her. I hope she reads it. We love you and miss you very much….please come back to us!



NOTE: Those who are or have been addicted to drugs or have suffered loss due to the drug addiction of others are invited to send their story to mhogan@journal-times.com fax to 474-0013 or 286-4201, or drop off at the Grayson or Olive Hill offices.

        

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